Call for a re-think of how fatherhood looks like

Psychologist, Professor Malose Langa, says society needs to start normalising seeing fathers as more than just being providers.

He says more focus should be put on the person who’s involved in a child’s life, rather than the person who sired them.

Langa is part of the research team that collated the recently released State of South Africa’s Fathers 2024 report, which shows that the face of fatherhood has changed in the country with more women entering the workspace and being primary providers in their homes.

According to the report, a higher percentage of women (85.1%) than men (79.8%) in the country, reported that they provided financial support to their biological children.

The report also found that in 2023, 40.3% of the country’s children lived with stepfathers, grandfathers or uncles, while only 35.6% reside with their biological fathers in the same household.

It shows that economic instability is one of the factors that determine a father’s presence in a child’s life, as some leave their home in search of employment.

Langa says parenting is much more than just having a traditional family dynamic due to the change in society that has been happening over the years.

He cites, among others, same-sex couple households as another example of the evolution of society.

 

Speaking to YNews, Langa urged parents to find a way to continue playing their individual roles in a child’s life even when their relationship has ended.

He emphasises that active parenthood for men, just like women, doesn’t only have to be financial.

There’s also calls for men to be taught from a young age about the importance of caregiving and emotional support for their loved ones, including children.

 

Psychologist, Dr Shaheeda Omar, says while more women entering the workspace and taking on the role of primary providers is a positive development; it is concerning that some children are growing up in unbalanced homes.

She says creating a stable home makes a huge difference in a child’s development. This includes increased self-esteem, stronger social skills, better academic performance and a greater sense of security and well-being.

 

 

The Convenor of the Moral Regeneration Movement’s Interim Committee in the North West, Pastor Lesiba Kgwele, agrees with Dr Omar that the prevalence of children growing up without their biological fathers is a worrying trend.

Social media users have also shared their views on the scourge.

Yall need to come up with a law on this. U impregnate. U marry by force and never be allowed divorce.

— Two30 (@TheeCityzen) February 13, 2025

Family values, Agriculture & presence were imbedded in African families until those people who came & forced men to work for money to pay tax. Today african families are broken, whilst “they’re” living peacefully with their families, something they found us doing.

— AMM (@Aya_Muzi) February 13, 2025

I recall when I was unemployment my girlfriend who is now my x told me that our child Will grow regardless of my presence in her life, I must just go away, I’m still hurt

— Shallow Ramafikeng (@shallow49164250) February 13, 2025

Is this a culture issue or a race issue?
Food for thought.

— Bob the builder (@unatypical_) February 13, 2025

Children in South Africa’s single-parent homes might idealize absent fathers due to attachment theory, where the longing for the missing parent can inflate their perceived importance. This idealization might stem from cognitive dissonance, rationalizing absence as a form of…

— Wong Fei Hung’s MªšťəŘ 丹尼尔 (@Phala_moramaga) January 5, 2025